Hollywood

Well, Debra Saunders is mad at Hollywood for failing to recognize the brilliance of the movie "Signs." As she says, ""Signs" is about real American beauty, the inner souls of regular folk. There's no preaching down to middle America. Instead, there is a real preacher. His name is Graham Hess (played by Mel Gibson), a Pennsylvania corn farmer/minister who loses his faith after his wife is killed in a freak accident -- and is sunk in despair be cause God is no longer in his life."

But rather than stay down in the dumps, Ms. Saudners offers several helpful hints for M. Night Shyamalan in his future search for an oscar.

1) First of all, the main charectar should end the story by discovering his or her sexuailty. Ms. Saunders suggests "gay, other wise, or why bother."

2) As an alternative, Mr. Shyamalan might have the main charectar sell his farm "in order to dedicate him self to a fight against bio-engineered corn."

3) You might borrow more from other alien invasion movies, such as Independence Day. Yes, Ms. Saunders suggests, the key to future Oscar victories: being more like Independence Day.

4) Preach to your audience, tell them what they should think. After all look at Erin Bockovich and Traffic, two big preachy movies that won Oscar Nominations (and then lost out to Gladiator).

On a side note I'm nominating This is Spinal Tap for the eighteenth year in row, because, once again, all the movies made this year sucked.