Your Number #1

Time's person of the year is, well, everybody. And Ben Shapiro is annoyed at that. He's so angry that people he doesn't like get the nod. People like drunk girls with webcams and, well, me.

Congratulations, rambling drunk college girl with a Webcam. You're changing the world with your profile on MySpace. Sure, those photos will come back to haunt you when you go job-searching, let alone when your future children Google you. But revel in the fact that you are Time's Person of the Year.

. . . Three cheers for Democratic Underground posters, shaking things up with your regular psychotic breakdowns. Without you, we'd never know about the threat of President-select Smirky Chimp Bushitler.

Psychotic breakdowns eh? I think saying mean things about President Bush doesn't quite qualify as a psychotic breakdown. But perhaps those charming lads at Free Republic, one of whom turned out to be guilty of causing the Anthrax scare, would know better than me.

If you are wondering who Make me a Commentator!!!'s person of the year is, once again it's me. I've won four years in a row, which is pretty impressive, you have to admit.